If it's brown, flush it down.

Poop Burglar

Ventura County Sheriff via APAndrew David Jensen

Taking a dump in someone’s home without flushing after you’ve robbed them is not only classless — it’s stupid.

Investigators in Southern California found some valuable DNA evidence in a toilet after responding to a burglary call last October. The criminal “did his business and didn’t flush it,” Ventura County Sheriffs Detective Tom Lohman told reporters.

They collected a sample (something to think about the next time you complain about your job) and sent it in for testing.

Ten months later, a match was discovered! The burglar was identified as Andrew David Jensen, who was arrested on July 28.

Lohman said it’s the first case he knows of in which evidence collected from a toilet led to an arrest.

“When people think of DNA evidence, they usually think of hair samples or saliva,” he said.

Jensen, age 42, is now being charged with first-degree residential burglary and had bail set at $180,000 and is scheduled to make his first court appearance Wednesday.

Talk about a crappy week.


Next, read about how Brooklyn dog-owners are refusing to vaccinate their dogs over autism fears. Then, see how this Kentucky man failed miserably while robbing his own grandma’s grave.

Annie Garau
Annie is a NYC-based writer. For tips, write to [email protected]
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